In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
