I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
