Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize
