We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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