Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Randomize
