Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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