she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
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