We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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