kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
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