How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Randomize
