so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
