so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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