He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
