Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
