i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
