Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
