...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
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