Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Randomize
