he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I made him laugh his dick is mine
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
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