I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
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