I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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