and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize