Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
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