I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
My life is pants optional.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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