Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
