when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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