Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
