What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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