does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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