why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
