True but thats because hes a fetus.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
