sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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