I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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