I smell stomach acid.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Green mimosas i think yes
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
