dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
What happened to fro yo and sex?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
