Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
