i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Randomize
