Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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