Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
