therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
