You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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