"it" just moved
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
