I think scott just propositioned me for sex
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
