we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Vodka?
Forever.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize