And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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