Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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