I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
