So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
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