ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Randomize
