the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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